Start of Week 4

Wow, what a journey it's been so far. Hard to believe by the end of this week, I will have achieved my goal to make it four weeks straight, working out at least 5 days a week. You know what I get at the end of this week, right? A PEDICURE!!! Most importantly, I get to call this a habit. THAT, folks, is a milestone in and of itself for me. For those that know my personality, they know I used to be gung ho for a 2 weeks, then usually get tired and give in. This is yet another sign to myself that I am NOT weak. I am strong and can achieve anything, with God by my side.

Why am I being so public
Some may question why I am putting all of this out there. Too much information, perhaps? Well, as I said in the beginning of my journey, I am putting the REAL me out there. No more hiding. Hiding, for me, was what birthed more shame. If I hide, I am shameful and the vicious cycle that tears me down starts again. I really DO NOT LIKE being the center of attention. This is all really out of my comfort zone. I am NOT feeling sorry for myself. I DO NOT want any to EVER feel sorry for me. I DO LOVE myself, which is I am here now. I got myself here and I am working VERY hard to get myself to a healthy place. If my posts seems like I'm being too hard on myself, perhaps I am, BUT that is what is going to push me more. I KNOW my limits. If it is too much for some to handle, keep moving. I don't mind. My feelings will not be hurt. I really do need to do this for me. It is causing a tremendous growth in me. It is causing me to not hide behind my weight any longer. I am seeing myself in a new light, in the way God intended. I only want those to be a part of this journey that really want to be. If I can help one other person on their own journey, to spark a life change, that is an added benefit. Love you all and thank you for listening and for your continued support. It really does mean so much.

Weekend Reflections
I am an addict. A food addict. I loved mostly fast food. To me, it was a "Treat". I would say to myself, "Go ahead Sarah, you deserve it". Thinking back on those statements, I realized, I thought that little of myself to say I deserved putting that CRAP in my body. Really, that's all I thought of myself? That's not love. That is lust and feeding an addiction.
Like any other addiction, this is not going to be a month long process. This is not going to be a year long process. This is for the REST.OF.MY.LIFE. I better get used to this, because I plan to live A.VERY.LONG.TIME. If I'm going to get used to this, I need practice. I am going to mess up along the way. THAT is OKAY. What is NOT okay, is to use that as an excuse to stay down. My past pitfall, "I messed up". "I failed". "I may as well give in". Not anymore. You mess up, you move on. That is my new motto. Love yourself enough to forgive yourself and MOVE ON.